You’re still a valuable person when you’re in isolation or quarantine

My favourite tree in the park nearby. This was my screensaver on my phone when I was housebound. A little bit of the outside, inside.

All this Coronavirus and self-isolation business is triggering for me. I was mostly housebound for some weeks/months in 2015 and 2018 due to Post Viral Fatigue Syndrome (more on that here). With luck and vigilance, I am mostly well these days, but I am afraid of getting another viral infection and the potential for fatigue relapse (the ME Association has a good post on Coronavirus and ME/CFS, and here’s a Twitter thread about ME/CFS and viral infections).

One of the hardest things about being housebound and ill was having no external validation for my worth as a person. Our culture is achievement-based, production-worshipping and glorifies workaholism. It’s hard to feel like a valued person when you can no longer participate in the things our society rewards, things like hard work and exercise. There are no rewards for long periods of rest. You become invisible.

Here’s something I sent to a chronically ill and housebound person via Spoonie Pen Pals a little while ago. Spoonie Pen Pals is a service that matches chronically ill people to chat as pen pals.

This is what I wanted to hear when I was housebound, ill and lonely. Maybe it will be helpful to other people have experience of being housebound, or to people who are worried about self-isolation or quarantine due to Coronavirus.

You are a valuable human being…

• When you’ve been in bed for a week
• When you can’t remember the last time you wore non-pajama clothes
• When you watch Netflix for three days straight
• When your parent/ sibling/ housemate does your shopping for you
• When you haven’t replied to your Whatsapps for days
• When you can’t perform care duties for others
• When you’re trying to get better
• When you’re not trying to get better
• When you’re being a perfect patient
• When you’re being self-destructive
• When the grief for what you’ve lost is overwhelming
• When you feel envious of healthy people
• When you’re having a self-pity party
• When someone tells you, either with their words, actions or lack of action, that you’re not valuable
• When you don’t value yourself